Sometimes I wonder why I bother with the family, especially my mom.

My relatives got back from their short trip...the one I was going to go on but then didn't because of my new job. It was decided before they left that we'd all go out to eat after my dance class. I knew they were due back yesterday late afternoon, but I didn't hear from them and assumed our original plans were still happening.

After class, I checked my voice mail, which was left at 7:46 pm. It was my mom, "hi Rosie. We're going for dinner at 8 at Fisherman's Terrace. Let me know if you're going to come later. Maybe we'll still be there."

GRR! Thanks for letting me know about the change of plans earlier. Good thing I wasn't starving after class or anything. I called to say I was going to drop by. I guess they weren't even expecting me because there was no table setting. But they had set aside some food for me, which was all cold by the time I ate it. And then when I went to have some of the food that was still on the table that wasn't set aside for me, people were commenting that I was *gasp* having *more* food.

I am truly pissed off, especially at my mother.  I feel like I never matter to her. When I was younger, she always sided with my dad. When they had problems, the only time she paid any attention to me was to ask for information about my father and complain about their relationship. When family visits, I can forget about hearing from her. She will do a lot of nice things for everyone else, but I feel like an after thought. Her friends think she loves me to death. But once again, like my dad, I think she shows me she cares by giving me things in the form of refund cards or coupons.

And during dinner, my aunt told me they decided that the plan for Christmas was to go to Australia. She asked me if I was coming. Since I didn't really have time to mull it over, I said no (no tends to be my first answer when I don't have time to think). The deal is that I have extremely little vacation time. She knows this, but I don't understand why she can't grasp that fact. I know I can use my 2008 vacation time, but my cousin is getting married, and I am not going to book any of those days until I know when he's having his wedding -- 2008 or 2009.

So my aunt started giving me a hard time about it. For @%#%s sake...I can bet that if I was a guy that I wouldn't be getting the second degree...because a woman's job is just not as important as a man's. If a male cousin of mine (or the female doctor) says they're busy, they just accept it. But oh no...because it's me...because I don't make a shitload of money or have some super high status, I just matter less.

One thing I really dislike about Chinese culture sometimes is that appearance and status are king.

This visit from the relatives has just made me want to hang out with them less, as much as I still love being around my cousins and my grandmother. It's the baby boomers that are killing me!