So now I am home, sick...with a fridge full of food that I won't be able to taste. Last night, for dinner there was a roasted lemon rosemary chicken with onions and potatoes, steamed purple cauliflower, stir fried green beans with bacon bits, pesto lemon pepper bread, and apple crisp.

There are also pear silver dollar pancakes in the fridge. 

I had the worst emotional day ever yesterday. I still need to figure out what will help with me being all emotional right before Aunt Flo comes. I couldn't stop crying! I was so upset! I guess not getting enough sleeping and still having all that caffeine in my body didn't help. I could hardly think straight.

Like I said, Mr. Nick woke me up at 7, so I was out of bed at 7:30. I didn't eat anything because I was going to wait until he was up before making pancakes. And I didn't want to do anything too noisy as to not wake him. I was pretty hungry, but then it passed. We ended up eating breakfast around 11. I was actually quite mad by then...for no real reason except that I felt like I was waiting all morning to cook him breakfast, and he didn't really do much to help. 

By the time we finished breakfast and the dishes, I was really really tired, so I told Mr. Nick I was going to take a nap. He asked me how long. I told him he could go home for his bike ride, but he said he'd go to the mall for a bit after his shower. While he was showering, I was sleeping lightly, and when he left about half an hour later, he woke me up, and I couldn't get back to sleep.

I had also lent him my keys, thinking he'd be back around an hour. So...three hours later he comes back. I had called him about a half hour before he came back because I was livid. Him not answering his phone made me even more livid! I wanted to know when he was coming back. I was stranded in my own home! I need my key fob to get in and out of my building. I cried some more. (Sagittarians need their freedom!!) Not only was I stuck at home, but I felt like I hadn't really hung out with my boyfriend all weekend.

Luckily, he didn't hear my voice mail message...I was quite upset. I did tell him in person what I said on the phone, though. I just didn't want him to hear how upset I was. When he came home, I knew he hadn't heard my message because he was quite cheerful. Meanwhile, I was drawing a bath, and then I burst into tears! He probably thought I was crazy.

But I had all these pent up emotions from the beginning of the weekend. I felt like he didn't want to hang out when I dropped by his place after work Friday, and then I felt like he didn't want to hang out before we out with his friends Saturday night.

Often, I need some time to warm up again to Mr. Nick if I haven't seen him in a couple of days, if we haven't had any physical contact,  or if I've been upset about something and haven't completely let it go. Saturday night, I felt like I was sleeping next to a stranger. He doesn't like when I tell him he's like a stranger to me. But I can't help it! I can't sleep next to people I'm not at ease with!

At one point he said he was thinking of going for a bike ride on Sunday. The part where he doesn't usually plan anything for us to do really bugs me, so I guess the part that bugged me was -- when we were going to hang out on the weekend? In the wee hours of Sunday morning (we had another one of our late-night "discussions"), I also told him I felt like all I was doing Sunday was cooking for him, and that thought didn't appeal to me. When Sunday actually rolled around, I felt like that again because I woke up, was up for hours being quiet,  cooked him breakfast, was stuck at home for hours waiting for him to come home, and then it was close to time to start dinner.

I was so bummed I just wanted to sulk (I really felt like my whole day was wasted), but we ended up going for a walk to this really small park. It was all set up for the Chinese Mid Autumn Festival, and that all these huge lanterns set up every where. The walk really lifted my spirits.

We had our dinner, but I couldn't eat much of it because I was feeling ill. The apple crisp was quite delightful. It was topped with an oatmeal topping. He did the dishes (he usually does when cook :-)), and then we went to bed. I was so tired!