Skin loss


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Skin loss
06.10.09 (11:07 am)   [edit]

Why aren't there razors that are shin-friendly! I've normally been very careful. But last night, I don't know what I was thinking (or wasn't thinking!) I lost skin on both shins!! I haven't lost skin in years!!! Serves me right for not wearing glasses while shaving, I guess.

And hurrah! The purchase of my place has gone through! Now I just need to get the phone call about picking up my keys.

Last night, Mr. Nick and I saw our counselor. I think we finally had some sort of breakthrough. I was thinking that we'd had a lot of sessions already with not a whole lot of progress. But then again, we'd not been very diligent about practising what we learned in counseling. Anyway, she gave us a tongue lashing. The bottom line is that we can no longer keep assuming the other person is a mind reader. And I need to provide Mr. Nick with unconditional support.

What I do know from my seminar that providing unconditional support is not always easy, at least I've had some practice now.

I usually leave those counseling sessions feeling really down. Last night was no exception. 

There was something else I was going to write, but I don't remember what now...

Oh! Yes! The J Man invited me to a good-bye gathering he's organizing. Luckily I can't make it; otherwise, I'd be thinking about whether I wanted to or not. He's off to Sweden for several months to work and travel. I haven't talked to him or seen him since we broke up a couple/few years ago except for that one time we saw each other while I was at a bus stop and then we Facebook messaged each other with some brief catchup small talk. Yet I feel like it's some last chance to say bye or see him or something. Maybe I wouldn't even be thinking about this if I hadn't seen a photo of him yesterday and then started thinking about a certain part of his anatomy...BWAHAHA

 


posted by: bawdy (reply)
post date: 06.10.09 (1:30 pm)

Unconditional support in everything he does regardless?



posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 06.10.09 (1:47 pm)

Reply to: bawdy
Yes, pretty much...unless it's harmful to himself or others, I guess. I do have difficulty wrapping my head around her suggestion because not only do I offer unconditional support, I'm not supposed to offer advice unless asked. I never thought of myself as the advice-doling kind of person anyway, but I feel like I she is asking me to stifle everything that's on my mind.



posted by: barnabus1 (reply)
post date: 06.10.09 (3:19 pm)

To my untrained eye...she's trying to make you over..into somebody else! Change is not always possible within us...even when we desperately want it!!



posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 06.10.09 (3:27 pm)

Reply to: barnabus1
I know people ultimately can't change, but habits can...that's all I can say!



posted by: bawdy (reply)
post date: 06.11.09 (12:37 pm)

Reply to: rosietulips

Hmmm..it sounds like she's made a judgment of you as overbearing. Some people never ask for advice, and just because you offer advice, it doesn't mean you are necessarily telling him what to do. Does she also criticize him for things he should or shouldn't do?



posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 06.11.09 (12:52 pm)

Reply to: bawdy
Yeah, she told me I had too many rules. But I've never said Mr. Nick can't do this or can't do that. I've never said anything! I've made note of what I like and don't like...
She strongly suggested that he speak his mind more often. She even offered him solo counselling sessions if he needed help on being able to express himself.




posted by: bawdy (reply)
post date: 06.12.09 (12:36 pm)

Reply to: rosietulips

Do you feel she's taking sides and villain-izing (new word!) you? Constructive criticism for him, admonishment for you!



posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 06.12.09 (1:15 pm)

Reply to: bawdy
I think she is trying to remain impartial but I was thinking about what she said this morning and that she may not have a clear view of who I am! In our sessions, Mr. Nick comes across as someone who does not speak up for himself ever and then I come across as someone who is rigid and calls all the shots.



posted by: bawdy (reply)
post date: 06.13.09 (12:49 pm)

Reply to: rosietulips

Women do call all the shots because they close the playpen if they don't get their way!



posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 06.14.09 (8:02 am)

Reply to: bawdy
I feel like closing down the playpen for good!!



posted by: bawdy (reply)
post date: 06.14.09 (12:17 pm)

Reply to: rosietulips

That's a sure way to get him to speak up!

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