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| *pulls hair out* |
| 12.11.03 (11:23 am) [edit] |
|
Ah! Stress! Gotta love it. Lack of time makes me feel stressed. I'd better make a list of all the things I need to do because I feel like time is running out. With trying to get lots of rest (because my cold is only SLOWLY withering away) and getting errands run before I'm off for the weekend, every second counts! Why couldn't the malls be open for 24 hours for just ONE day? :wink: I got some grief today from Stef. I guess he was serious when he wanted to spend as much time with me as possible. I don't have time to see him today or today, and then I'm gone for a few days. He was a little upset (?), and said it seemed I was avoiding him. He is contributing to my stress :x And all I could think was "I don't need this right now," so I told him I was not going to have [this] conversation with him. Of course, this was after I dug myself into a hole. I came across as not being able to fit him into my oh-so-busy schedule. Maybe after this weekend will be better when I don't have to get ready for parties and weekend getaways. He flies home in a few weeks. I guess he also wanted to be my date for my work Christmas party. But I'm taking Paula. Here are some tidbits of info to my personality that makes me feel stressed with this whole Stef visit. Spending a copious amount of time with one person suffocates me. When it comes to guy-girl relationships, unless verbalized, I often live in a state of denial. "No, he doesn't like me that way. No, he's not expecting anything from me." Even though my friends are telling me, he's treating things as if we were in a relationship, I am adamant about saying, "WE'RE NOT!!!!" |
posted by: Sillygrrl3 (reply)
post date: 12.11.03 (12:15 pm)
you are the opposite of me. At least the "me" I have been lately! I am doing more of the "what did he mean by that?" and "we aren't dating but...". Hmmm - wonder if it is a cycle and in 6 months you will be thinking like I am now and I will be thinking like you are now (and how I used to think) Kara
posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 12.11.03 (1:01 pm)
Reply to: Sillygrrl3
Oooh, is there a guy in the picture right now??? :D Do tell!! :D
posted by: Sillygrrl3 (reply)
post date: 12.11.03 (1:20 pm)
Crap - I knew it would slip at some point! *Grin* There really isn't a guy - um - in the sense that he hasn't TOLD me that he is interested in me THAT WAY. I am worried it is more me INVENTING things! *Grin* and *sigh* - DOH! You are good Rosie!!! You and Barbara Walters!!! - kara
posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 12.11.03 (1:26 pm)
Reply to: Sillygrrl3
*teehee* So who is he?? What's the sitch?? Obviously, I let my words flow freely when it comes to guys milling around me!! :wink: Don't be shy!!
posted by: Sillygrrl3 (reply)
post date: 12.11.03 (1:45 pm)
Reply to: rosietulips
I guess this will be "safe" since my family and friends don't know that I am posting on your T-Blog right?!??! *Grin*
WEll -BGF (Best Guy Friend) from Thanksgiving posts would be him.
I know it is cliche and horrible because I don't want to lose our 3 year friendship, but... well there are these weird feelings there!
I kept saying it was the Chinese - SOOO NUMMY!!! While I was there! Just telling myself it was cause we haven't seen each other in forever etc.
I am not his type and he isn't my type. If you are a believer in type! I usually am not, but in this case he usually likes VERY THIN SHORT ladies and I am Tall and not so Thin.
I don't know what to do! I wrote Trina a huge long email asking for advice since she posts that Song of Solomon stuff and because she is married and so we shall see!
I really don't want to tell him because I don't want to ruin anything, but... maybe I need to do a relational "check up" and just ask if there could ever be anything between us!
I am sure that would be the grown up thing to do, but... who wants to be a grown up!??! *Grin*
Anyway - I could go on and on about my insecurities and fears. *sigh* I just don't know! - Thoughts??????
Kornfused Kara
posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 12.11.03 (3:33 pm)
Reply to: Sillygrrl3
Awwww...:D You could always wait and see what happens, but if you feel that strongly, you could say something, too!! As for the type thing, did you mean only physically? And is he bald?? :wink: You like bald guys? Do you mean shaved bald or naturally balding??
posted by: Sillygrrl3 (reply)
post date: 12.11.03 (3:53 pm)
Reply to: rosietulips
WEll Barbara - I can call you Barbara right? I feel we are beyond last names! ! *Grin*
I LOVE BALD MEN - Shaved bald! I keep telling my girlfriends that I want a man like a hairless cat! NO HAIR!!! Mmmm Bald! A few well placed tatoosmmmmmmmmm!!
Oops - sorry got carried away!
Type thing - FOR SURE physically but he tends to go for more helpless gals and I tend to go for more confident guys. OVERLY SO! *Grin*
Dang it he isn't bald and he will NEVER voluntarily be so!!! GRRRR *grin*
He is a cutie though! But I never thought so before! Weird huh? I thought he was good looking, but not BEAUTIFUL or anything!
I realized that i had feelings when we were talking and I thought contentedly to myself that "this is what I want it to be like if I get married!". Then I had to be sure I didn't say it out loud! 8Grin*
This has been kind of fun! I am glad i am getting it out! Trina responded and I need to reply! She said kinda the same - to tell if really love him! - kara
posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 12.11.03 (4:14 pm)
Reply to: Sillygrrl3
*L* You can call me Barbara if you'd like...but nobody else has called me that!! BWAHAHAA You can call me Amanda, though!!
I used to love hairless guys, but I am used to the hairier ones now.
So what do you think you will do about him??
posted by: Sillygrrl3 (reply)
post date: 12.11.03 (4:33 pm)
Reply to: rosietulips
WOOOHOO!!! I got the real first name!!! *grin* I will call you Amanda! Amanda was the name of my first best girlfriend when I was little.
I don't know... I think I will wait and pray and watch for signs that I am inventing! *grin*
I think I am getting enough bravery to ask him if he thinks we could ever be more than friend!
Is that the wussy way out? *grin*
Kara
posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 12.12.03 (9:55 am)
Reply to: Sillygrrl3
I don't think it'd be wussy at all!! That question could open up more discussion, that's for sure!!
posted by: Sillygrrl3 (reply)
post date: 12.12.03 (10:08 am)
Reply to: rosietulips
Amanda, last night in my dream I met my best friend from when I was young. I am sure she showed up because you are named Amanda and reminded me of her. In my dream she was much taller and much more beautiful than I. Interesting how dreams are huh? I was getting my hair cut and she walked in and we hugged and laughed and hugged and then we left and went to get food and apparently I worked there cause I told the food joint that I quit and then we got in a car and left. WEIRD!!!!! *grin* I will keep you posted on Mr. Man! - Kara
posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 12.12.03 (11:11 am)
Reply to: Sillygrrl3
Yes, keep me posted! :D Okay, so I am a little nosy...*L*
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